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Let's be honest, nobody really LOVES Valentine's Day, do they? Many argue it's just a made-up Hallmark holiday, and you must admit they have a point. I've seen store shelves begin vomiting pink and red hearts as early as the day after Christmas. And truthfully, it can be a bit of a downer if you're single and wish you weren't, or if have young school-aged kids with 24 other students in each class for whom they (read: you) must make handmade Pinterest valentines (or buy the corny, overpriced, store-bought versions). Any teacher will tell you, a classroom full of two dozen preschoolers hyped-up on valentine candy bears little resemblance to the sweet cherubs pictured on said valentines. For most of us, it becomes a forced, obligatory day to spend money on roses and heart-shaped boxes of chocolate and then summon all of our will-power not to eat any of it. And by the way, how did the feast day of a saint come to be associated with so much sex and edible underwear?
Like many, I used to really dislike Valentine's Day for all of the reasons listed above. Until, that is, I began to reflect on why this day is named after St. Valentine in the first place. First, a brief lesson: Very little is known about the real St. Valentine, but he is believed to have been a priest (and some say bishop) and physician who was martyred for his faith in Rome during the third century. Some accounts say he befriended and healed from blindness his jailer's daughter. Others claim he defied the Emperor by secretly marrying couples to spare the husbands from war. He is the patron saint of lovers, epileptics and beekeepers (which I, as a lover and a former epileptic who loves honey, can really appreciate). Now, as anyone can tell you, the Catholic Church doesn't make just any ol' body a saint. Martyrdom alone requires a great demonstration of love, as does healing your enemy's daughter and risking your life to spare others theirs. So it makes sense that a day about love would be associated with this saintly, loving personality, regardless of how much of the legend is based in fact. I would argue that if we re-calibrate the meaning of Valentine's Day to focus more on loving all others as St. Valentine did, rather than on just emphasizing romance and retail sales, it takes on a whole new meaning and could easily become a new favorite holiday. So what does it mean to LOVE ALL? L - Listen more, talk less O - Observe where you can meet the needs of another V - Value every being, even those who are challenging to love E - Empathize with those who are hurting A - Act to make the world a better place L - Lean in and don't be afraid to risk yourself, your pride, or your comfort for the sake of others L - Learn from those whom you wish to emulate, as well as from your own mistakes Let Valentine's Day be an opportunity to celebrate all types of love, not just romance or love of chocolate, and to express it in all manner of ways. Be sensitive to the fact that people who don't have a sweetheart often need extra love from everyone else on February 14th. Maybe those little kids have the right idea in giving a valentine to everyone, even those they find challenging, because we all need love and love is all we need. What are some valentines you can pass out to show those in your life that they are special and valuable? Some ideas:
It doesn't take a dozen roses or a heart-shaped box of chocolate to make someone feel loved on Valentine's Day. With a little thought and a lot of heart, celebrating love on Valentine's Day--and every day--can be easy peasy!
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 Happy New Year! The busy holiday season is now in the rear view mirror once again. Does that leave you feeling deflated or relieved? Perhaps a little of both? Hopefully you were able to take some time off at some point over the past few weeks to celebrate whatever holiday/s you observe with family and friends. But so often that kind of time "off" from the pressures of work and the swirl of daily routines isn't as relaxing and refreshing as we'd like amidst the hustle and bustle of the holiday season. And now it's time to return to business as usual...that can be both depressing and reassuring at the same time. But this year can be different. As you put away the last of your festive decorations, take some time to reflect upon and unearth your center. Your center is that sacred space within yourself that brings you inner peace and refreshes your cup so that you can keep pouring it out to others all year long. It can be a physical stress-reliever like exercise or yoga; a spiritual journey through scripture and prayer; cuddle time with your children; date night with your spouse; or a hike through the woods to breathe in all of nature's magnificent beauty. Whatever it is, it's deeply personal. It feeds your soul. You need it like you need water and air to breathe. Neglect it at your peril. And neglect it most of us do. We all know a new year is the ideal time to make a few changes to improve the quality of our everyday life. That's why we make all those new year's resolutions to lose weight, organize, spend less, read more, etc. But those are just about establishing routines and completing tasks. Finding your center is about loving yourself enough to learn how to nourish your soul. Only then will you have the focus, energy and peace of mind needed to love others and to realize your full potential. This year, how about just resolving to find your center and then feed it? It may take some trial and error to identify it, but you'll know when you've found it, because you'll have more focus and energy to devote to doing everything else without feeling stressed and resentful. You probably already know where to look...you just need to stop ignoring it. Finding and feeding your center every day...that's the key to easy peasy living!  Be honest. How many New Year's resolutions have you actually kept? I mean kept long term...as in accomplishments you have maintained over the years since you made up your mind to change?
Most of us resolve on January 1 to get fit, lose weight, get organized, quit smoking, save money... We jump head first into it only to burn out and give up before Valentine's Day. Many of us keep making the same resolutions year after year...and fail at them year after year. For it to work and to stick, it requires commitment to real change...life change...permanent change. That's not something to undertake on a whim or to jump into without a plan, especially since our self-esteem is usually the biggest casualty of non-success. Resolutions may be made overnight but are only truly achieved over a lifetime. They require personal evolution. Anyone who has studied science knows that evolution takes time and patience...perseverance, adaptability and survival. To put the odds in your favor, set yourself up for success:
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AuthorValerie Sheridan is a professional organizer, wife, mother of two, and Founder/Owner of EasyPeasy Living. Archives
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